The best thing I think I have ever done is almost, literally forgot about the past trauma and past bullshit. I just don’t let my mind go back there, its taken me about 7 years to train my brain not to relive the demons. Sometimes I get into a dark place, and my mind doesn’t know who to blame and it tries to go back there. It’s a fight to push my self to stay away from the past, because it doesn’t help me, it has only ever held me back and made things worse. I used to blame every bad mistake, every bad decision on the year behind me because it seemed easier to deal with pity then what was right in front of me. Through my battle with addiction, through my on-going battle with mental health the past has always played games with me. I’ve just decided to stop putting blame on things that happened years ago, its merely an excuse.
I’ve changed so much for the better because I’ve moved on and considered my past a learning curve, a lesson and what has shaped me today. NOT an anchor that is tied to my foot and drowns me. WE can only be healthy today, by putting the past away and remembering the good times, good people and lessons learned.